Today has been a day I’d like to
forget or even better start again. Faith has a UTI...again. She does not have a
temperature or look unwell she just feels really sick in the tummy. Her tube
feeds seem to equal vomit but we are getting some food into her throughout the
day. I read a post at “What do you do dear?” blog and as I read it tears streamed
down my face. She wrote of her struggle with ‘forever.’ I could really understand how she was feeling that day. Her son will have Spina
Bifida forever. Just like Faith will have it forever. It is a subject close to my heart as
lately I have been struggling with Faith having Spina Bifida forever. Right
now, when I am in the thick of really bad days and tears seem to be on
speed dial I wonder will the good days come again? And yes, they do appear
again and I am grateful for their much anticipated arrival.
This morning was a horrible
morning. Faith was unwell and I was struggling to manage. I wanted to hide but
I could not. I had to face it. Making it through the day was a challenge. When
we sat her in her stingray pram and took her for a stroll in the garden she
smiled, she giggled. She reached out and touched the washing blowing the warm
spring breeze and she touched the leaves on the hedge. She took it all in.
These are the moments I hold onto when I think how can I make it through
another minute? It is not my strength but God’s alone sustaining me.
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